Friday
Thursday
Subject: How to get to Heaven from Scotland
I was testing children in my Glasgow Sunday
School class to see if they understood the
Concept of getting into heaven.
I asked them, "If I sold my house and my
Car, had a big jumble sale and gave all my
Money to the church, would that get me
Into heaven?"
"NO!" the children answered.
"If I cleaned the church every day, mowed
The garden and kept everything tidy, would
That get me into heaven?"
Again, the answer was 'No!'
By now I was starting to smile.
"Well, then, if I was kind to animals and
Gave sweeties to all the children, and
Loved my husband, would that get me
Into heaven?"
Again, they all answered 'No!'
I was just bursting with pride for them.
I continued, "Then how can I get into heaven?"
Little Johnny shouted, "Yuv got tae be dead"
Kinda brings a wee tear tae your eye...
Little Johnny and the Royal Wedding
Little Johnny and his mother were two of the lucky few who were invited to the Royal Wedding of Prince William and Kate Middleton.
Attending a wedding for the first time, Little Johnny whispered to his mother,
‘Why is the Kate Middleton dressed in white?”
The mother replied, ‘Because white is the colour of happiness and today is the happiest day of her life.’
Little Johnny thought about this for a moment then said, ‘So why is Prince William wearing black?’
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